Isolated

He might have gotten a puppy and that makes me angry.

If he did, why did he complain that he didn't want Argos because his house would have smelled like dog? 

If he did, I hope he realizes the full financial hole he is digging himself in.

I hope he realizes that for most of our dog's life, I was the one who got her shots, who bathed her, her bought her food and treats.  I hope he underestimated everything if he did get this dog.

I hope he has trouble taking care of a kid, a fucking whore, a fucking dog after he realizes she doesn't make shit and his bonus won't last.

At the same time I feel more defeated - that was going to be our new addition, we were going to get a puppy together.

How can he be so happy but tell me he's not, that he thinks of me every day.  It's all just bullshit that I fall for.  He's getting the family he always wanted.  He's feeling needed like he always wanted.  He never wanted to be equals with who he was with, never wanted to be part of a team, he wanted to be fucking depended on.

Even after all this, why do I still care?   Why does it hurt so much?  He's living our future with someone else.